i think i have to learn to believe this loneliness in me is forever. that i will always go back to this feeling. am i giving up hope or am i being realistic? i don't know. if it's the former, i think i'm giving up too soon, but if it's the later, then it's good i'm starting now.
should i start preparing myself? because it's better to be prepared and then be proven otherwise, than having my hopes shattered in the end. but that's cowardly, and i know how cowardly i am.
a mental fight against cowardice. i'm as pathetic as it sounds.
